It looks like there was more toDanielle Staub‘s infamous pull ofMargaret Josephs‘ ponytail thanReal Housewives of New Jerseyfans originally saw.

As she explained, she didn’t plan on ever physically attacking Josephs, who had poured a bottle of water on her head earlier during their tense war of words. In fact, she felt the two were “even” when she poured the contents of Josephs’ purse onto a lit candle.

“I was … influenced,” Staub told Gorga, after first blaming the move on an abundance of alcohol. “I was done when I emptied Margaret’s bag in the candle. I was finished, but then Steven told me I should go pull her hair. When Steven said, ‘Do it,’ I hesitated and then I looked at Teresa and she said, ‘Yeah, do it.’ ”

“So Teresa told you to pull her hair?” Gorga, 40, asked in disbelief.

“Yes,” Staub, 57, confidently said.

Previously unseen production footage then backed-up Staub’s claim, the clip showing Dann laughing as Giudice egged on Staub.

“He wants me to pull her ponytail,” Staub whispered in Giudice’s ear in the clip, with a laugh.

But Giudice insisted. “Yes!” she said, giddily getting in Staub’s face. “Do it. Do it. Do it. Do it. Do it. Do it. Do it. Do it!”

Daniel Zuchnik/Getty; Bruce Glikas/Getty; Ben Gabbe/Getty

Teresa Giudice, Danielle Staub, Margaret Josephs

“It is very painful for me to relive,” Josephs, 52, said of the fight with Staub, before the episode aired. “The energy that day frightened me and to this day it still does.”

“I have never hit anyone nor did I after being pushed or being assaulted from behind,” Josephs added. “What I did do after a half hour of a brutal back and forth with my personal space being invaded was to pour water on someone who was clearly looking to assault me and push me into a physical altercation.”

“My neck was snapped back, and easily could have been broken,” said Josephs. “I could not defend myself. I could have been paralyzed. Everyone was crying, including production. It was horrific. I wanted to forget [and] move on. To this day, [I’m] devastated.”

Asked if she had any regrets, Staub said, “Hell no” — stressing, “My only regret is not doing it sooner.”

Since then, Staub has announced she’s leavingRHONJ, revealing onWatch What Happens Live with Andy Cohenthatshe would “never” return to the series that made her a star(and that she helped made a success).

As for her friendship with Giudice, that’s fallen apart, too.

“We’re no longer friends now,” Giudice told PEOPLE during a visit toPEOPLE Nowearlier this month. “You have to watch the rest of the season to see how it plays out. … She never did anything to me, but then watch the show, you’ll see what she does to me, and now we’re not friends anymore!”

“I wish her well,” Giudice added. “We did have fun together, she’s funny, and she’s a good time to go out with. And I’m all about that. That’s what it was about. You never know what happens in the future but you’ll understand when you watch.”

The Real Housewives of New Jerseyairs Wednesdays (8 p.m. ET) on Bravo.

source: people.com